Levi Johnston is a Jackass

Say what you will about Sarah Palin, her supporters, and their delusional view of American politics. You're certainly entitled to your opinion, as are her supporters. Were she ever to become president, I personally would lose all faith in American democracy and gnaw off my own leg. But I've always said the one caveat to that is to leave her kids out of it; President Obama was absolutely right to reject those who wanted to make Bristol Palin's pregnancy into a campaign issue, and as far as I'm concerned it's still off-limits.

The one guy who most aggressively refuses to respect that line, though, is Levi Johnston. Every time he opens his mouth he embarrasses himself, Bristol, her family and their child. What a narcissistic, self-serving tool. I mean, take one look at this guy:


My snap judgment, knowing nothing else about him, would be something like, "Hey, that guy looks like a giant douche." All he's really missing is a popped collar and a sideways Boost Mobile hat. Now take this caricature of a teenage male egomaniac and add the fact that not only did he knock up the governor's daughter, then abandon her and their kid before going on to badmouth her family to the national media, he's now actively trying to make money off of it. Not only is he having his little media tour and stripping for Playgirl, he has also appeared in a Wonderful Pistachios commercial. The ad makes a not-so-subtle quip about how now he uses "protection," i.e., the protective health benefits of eating pistachios. Tee-hee, that has two meanings! Ugh. Really? Did they have a fifth grader write that? What an unmitigated jackass. And way to make light of a serious social issue. Stay classy, Wonderful Pistachios.

I actually have a lot of respect for how Sarah Palin has handled this situation; she's certainly shown a lot more patience and restraint than the little twerp deserves.